God Indifferent to Football; Satan Still Heavily Invested

Armchair philosophers have argued for years, often with nobody in particular paying attention to them, that God doesn’t care who wins or loses a football game. With a balanced mix of the devout, the disinterested, and the despicable on both sides of the ball—not to mention the long list of actually important problems on Earth to occupy God’s time—the notion that God notices, much less intervenes in, an essentially irrelevant athletic activity played by maybe 0.06% of the world’s population is a pretty silly one to a lot of folks.¹

On the other hand, though, one should probably be forgiven for believing that Bill Belichick’s New England Patriots—having won the AFC East nine times since 2001, and now being one win away from reaching their fifth Super Bowl in eleven seasons—are proof that Satan is heavily invested in the NFL, and hasn’t lost his touch.

Sherman: Brother Dickinson, New England has been fighting the devil for more than a hundred years.
Dickinson: And as of now, Brother Sherman, the devil has been winning hands down.²

NOTES
1. That doesn’t mean, of course, that plenty of folks won’t still make the argument.
2. From 1776 (1976), John Dickinson to Roger Sherman.